New Reality TV Show Puts Needy Families in Moral Quandary

In my recent contribution to Time.com, I take a look at the ethical issues of a new reality TV show on CBS. It's often said that these reality TV shows are simply a magnifying glass on American society. Well, I certainly hope that our society is better than this!

Why ‘The Briefcase’ Is the Worst Reality TV Show Ever
CBS's new show "The Briefcase" takes advantage of desperate people and calls it entertainment
By Rabbi Jason Miller

This summer marks a milestone of sorts for the reality TV genre. It was 15 years ago that the television show “Survivor” became a breakout hit and gave birth to a new industry. Some of the most successful reality shows have helped talented individuals who may otherwise have gone unnoticed begin lucrative careers. But most of the reality TV productions tend to bring out parts of society that are unethical, exploitative, and just plain wrong.

The most extreme example of this aired its first episode two weeks ago on CBS. “The Briefcase” features financially struggling American families and showcases their many hardships. These are men and women who are down on their luck, out of work, and seem miserable. The premise of the show is that they are surprised with a gift of $101,000. Of course, there are strings attached.

These impoverished, hard-working people are given an unfair decision to make upon receipt of the “fortune.” They are told that the rules of this game (and it appears to me to be a game of playing with people’s minds) are that they can either choose to keep the money, which they desperately need, or gift all or part of it to another family in need. They aren’t told the other family has also received a similar briefcase and instructions.

Reaction to the show has been very critical, and an online petition calling for CBS to cancel the show has more than 100 signatures.

The biggest problem of the show is that it’s meant as entertainment. Yet the families featured on the show aren’t actors—they truly are struggling. They have lost hope as they try to keep their homes, feed their children, and pay their medical bills. Putting them in front of television cameras and presenting them with a “Faustian bargain” is cruel and unusual.

Are the Cleveland Cavaliers a Jewish Team?

I've always been of the opinion that one should, first and foremost, cheer for one's own hometown sports teams. For example, I've never understood how someone from Detroit could randomly choose another NFL team as "their team" instead of the local Detroit Lions (despite their lack of a single Super Bowl championship). However, when it comes to the playoffs, if one's own team isn't playing then it is acceptable to adopt a team and cheer for that team.

Here in Detroit, it's become the accepted practice to cheer for the Cleveland Cavaliers in the NBA postseason when the Detroit Pistons are not playing. While the Cavaliers might be one of the Pistons' closest rivals, Detroiters feel a connection with the team and can't resist liking them. Such has certainly been the case with me.

With Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert and former player Zydrunas Ilgauskas at a Friends of the IDF Event in Cleveland

Owned by Jewish philanthropist Dan Gilbert, the Cavs have become something of a first cousin to the Detroit Pistons. One might find it odd to enter the Downtown Detroit headquarters of Quicken Loans, the company Gilbert owns, and see a basketball court bedecked in Cleveland Cavaliers colors and logos. For Detroiters, however, this seems natural. In both Detroit and Cleveland, we've found a mutual appreciation for Gilbert, who has used his philanthropy and business savvy to bring a dual renaissance to Detroit and Cleveland, two major U.S. cities that have struggled financially in the past several decades. (Gilbert owns a casino in both cities, the Quicken Loans Arena ("The Q") in Cleveland, the Lake Erie Monsters hockey team, the Cleveland Gladiators arena football team, a large Downtown Cleveland office for Quicken Loans employees there, dozens of Detroit-based companies, and has bought over 75 buildings in Downtown Detroit).

With my son and Cleveland Cavaliers Coach David Blatt

Not only have the Cavs become the adopted team during the NBA playoffs for Detroit Pistons fans, but recent articles have called the Cavs "Israel's Team." Israel's Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu even phoned Head Coach David Blatt, who has Israeli citizenship, to wish him luck and tell him that the entire State of Israel was behind him. Almost a decade before the Cavs hired an Israeli coach, my first experience with Dan Gilbert's Cavs had a connection to Israel. I was invited to Quicken Loans Arena in 2006 to watch the Cavaliers take on Maccabi Tel Aviv in a pre-season game. The night before I attended a dinner at a synagogue in the Cleveland suburbs where Dan Gilbert was honored by Friends of the Israel Defense Forces. The two teams competed again before this season, but this time around it was more personal because Blatt used to coach Maccabi Tel Aviv.

My son and his friends with Cleveland Cavaliers Coach David Blatt

I would argue that the Cavs are a Jewish team too. If they win the NBA championship this year (the series begins tonight), they wouldn't be the first team with a Jewish owner and Jewish coach -- the Detroit Pistons won in 2004 with Larry Brown as coach and Bill Davidson as the majority owner. But there's a very Jewish feel to this team in which Gilbert and star player LeBron James had to perform teshuva before the season to repair their fractured relationship. When LeBron returned to Cleveland after his sojourn in Miami he had to apologize to Cleveland fans for his undignified exit a few years back and Gilbert had to make amends to LeBron for his unprofessional public letter. There's certainly a Yom Kippur sermon in there about healing relationships.

Sheryl Sandberg's Wise Words in the Face of Tragedy

One of the most challenging aspects of being a rabbi, in my opinion, is finding the right words to bring comfort to those mourning following the tragic death of a loved one. Aside from the traditional Hebrew phrase we offer mourners, I often find myself left with only four words to offer to those grieving: "There are no words."

After my infant nephew died and people were at a loss for words, I simply uttered, "There are no words." Truthfully though, there are words. And the words aren't necessary from those who are offering comfort. Sometimes the most meaningful words are from the mourners themselves. Those who are in pain from grief can actually find tremendous comfort in their own words.

This was not the case in the Torah following one of the biggest tragedies. After the sudden death of two of Aaron's sons, the Torah explains how the father handled his grief. Using only two words, we are told "Vayidom Aharon," Aaron was silent. So often, silence is the most natural way for mourners to deal with the shock of a sudden death of a loved one. However, after time ones own words may bring comfort.

Credit: Scott Eells/Bloomberg via Getty Images

Such was the case today with Sheryl Sandberg, the Facebook executive whose husband, Dave Goldberg, died suddenly last month. In a Facebook post today on the occasion of the completion of the sheloshim (30-day) period, Sheryl posted a beautiful and inspirational message on her public Facebook account. Her aim was to give back some of the words that were most helpful to her during her period of immense grief. She writes that she received wisdom and advice from close friends and strangers alike. She specifically singles out her close friend and Detroit native Adam Grant, who taught her three things essential to resilience. Sometimes rather than try to come up with the right words to offer to a mourner, we should just listen.

Sheryl's Facebook post has already been shared close to 40,000 times and major media outlets have helped circulate it. Mark Zuckerberg, Robert Scoble, Randi Zuckerberg and many other leading technology executives have commented on her post as well. Sheryl's words are too important and impactful not to share:

Sheryl Sandberg:

Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband—the first thirty days. Judaism calls for a period of intense mourning known as shiva that lasts seven days after a loved one is buried. After shiva, most normal activities can be resumed, but it is the end of sheloshim that marks the completion of religious mourning for a spouse.

Rabbi Vs. Ice Cube in Detroit Casino

Over the past day I've been answering my cellphone like this: "No, I have never heard of a rabbi here in Detroit named Taras!" News reports all over the internet are saying that a Rabbi P. Taras is suing rapper Ice Cube for $2 million after he was attacked by the Hip Hop star at the MGM Grand casino in Downtown Detroit, about twenty minutes from my home in Michigan.

Now, for the record, I don't believe there is such a rabbi named Taras here in Detroit. Of course, there could have been a rabbi visiting over the Memorial Day weekend, but I'm skeptical that a rabbi would be at a Detroit casino this past weekend since Shabbat went right into the 2-day holiday of Shavuot. This would have made it highly unlikely that a rabbi was in Downtown Detroit at a casino.

Ice Cube is accused of beating up a rabbi at the MGM Grand Casino in Detroit

The celebrity gossip website, TMZ.com, reports that this Rabbi P. Taras guy says he was attacked by Ice Cube because he was wearing a yarmulke (kippah) on Sunday, May 24. Well, again, I highly doubt any Jewish person wearing a yarmulke would have been at the MGM Grand on the Shavuot holiday, when going to a casino would be forbidden. I'll continue asking around myself, but my best guess is that this person was not a rabbi and as far as I know there was no Shavuot retreat being held at the MGM Grand Detroit.

While I personally do not gamble, I do enjoy walking around casinos and on one such visit to Las Vegas (I was in town for CES) in January 2013 I actually did happen upon a fight involving a famous rap star. I was not involved in this altercation at the Bellagio of course, but from a safe position about 20 yards away I watched as a drunk man was giving the rapper Tyga a hard time. This quickly escalated into a fight between when Tyga's bodyguard stepped in and gave the guy a pretty good beating until casino security stepped in. It's a good thing the police weren't called in because Tyga had just been released from a Las Vegas jail a few hours earlier for a minor traffic violation.

Update: On the TMZ.com website it looks like this P. Taras left a comment as "Rev Taras," so maybe he's actually a reverend (although that wouldn't explain the yarmulke). He posted the following comment: "This incident occurred in the HOTEL part, and their [sic] is video which is already in my possession. I am not releasing any videos due to the fact that Mr. Jackson has a right to defend this suit, and he has not yet been served with the complaint. When same happens, at the apporpriate [sic] time I will release such material. -P. Taras"

A Very Jewish Jeopardy!

I'm a big fan of Jeopardy! and try to watch every episode of the long running TV game show. I rarely watch an episode of Jeopardy! live, but make it a point to tune in to the episodes I recorded on my TiVo Roamio Pro.

Since Monday was the second day of the Shavuot holiday, I didn't watch that evening's episode until today. I started off doing very well getting the first dozen questions correct, but that's not what led me to blog about this episode of Jeopardy!

One question made me curoius as to whether they intentionally used this question on the episode that aired on Shavuot. The answer was the famous quote from The Book of Ruth in which Ruth says to Naomi, "Wherever you go I will go..." to which one of the contestants correctly provided the question, "Who was Ruth?" I thought to myself, I can't believe Jeopardy! used a question from The Book of Ruth on Shavuot.

I Gave "Kosher Soul" a Second Chance

A friend tipped me off to a new reality TV show that was about to begin publicizing its pilot episode. I was immediately intrigued. The show, Kosher Soul, is about a pretty Jewish woman and a Black comedian who fall in love. I clicked the link to find the trailer from the Lifetime network and was immediately disappointed. Oy, I thought to myself, this is not going to be "good for the Jews."

I posted the link to the trailer in a few rabbi discussion groups I'm part of and encouraged my colleagues to check out this video and give their own opinion. It was unanimous that we all cringed when we saw the typical, run-of-the-mill Jewish jokes interspersed with sub-par humor about African-Americans. One of my Rabbis Without Borders colleagues suggested we have a conference call right after the first episode airs so we can discuss and determine the best way to articulate our dismay of this farcical portrayal of everything from interdating to conversion to Black/Jewish relations.

©2015 A&E Television Networks, LLC. All rights reserved. Photo Credit: Richard Knapp

I helped coordinate the conference call, and we all seemed to have the same impressions about the show. It was a car wreck! I explained how I too was uncomfortable with the show, but that generally I detest reality television because it's almost as unreal as any other television sitcom. The actors are performing for the cameras, each episode has a theme, and the editors are going to cut the raw footage down to a bunch of sound bites for the 20 or so minutes of the final cut. It seemed to me, I explained, that O'Neal McKnight, the Black comedian, was trying to hard to market his comedy routines by offering one-liners that made me yawn rather than laugh out loud. The Jewish partner, Miriam Sternoff, came off as a snob who never seemed to feel comfortable having her private life aired to the masses. I didn't learn anything new from the conference call, but my sentiments about the show seemed to be the party line among my colleagues. I watched the first episode so I could have a coherent dialogue with my fellow rabbis and then, I reasoned, I'd never watch another episode of this filth again.

Israel in Nepal, Dan Gilbert's Detroit & Bar Mitzvahs for Disabled Teens: No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

As a parent, I find myself often telling my children that their benevolence will reap rewards. When they act in caring and helpful ways, especially for those in need, they will feel good about what they have done and others will appreciate it too. Sadly, we know this is not always the case. Beneficial actions can be met with outright hostility and trying to explain that sad fact to our children is difficult.

Three recent events are textbook examples of the well-known aphorism "No good deed goes unpunished." Each of these good deeds was muddled by political issues leading to criticism when praise was the more appropriate response. Consider these three cases and how the disapproval was misplaced.

Immediately following the April earthquake in Nepal, Israel acted quickly in sending a contingent of doctors and search-and-rescue specialists to the region. Israel is often one of the first nations to dispatch aid to disaster affected areas around the globe. While Israel’s response team in particular and Israel’s government in general weren’t looking for praise in response to their volunteerism, they weren’t expecting the harsh, undeserved criticism levied on them throughout social media.

One might think that the Israel Defense Forces (IDF) refused to send aid to Nepal after reading the ruthless attacks from around the world. Rather than commending this small nation for sending over 260 doctors, nurses and other highly skilled rescue personnel to Kathmandu, dissenters took to Facebook and Twitter to claim this was just a charade to try to deflect attention from Israel’s occupation of the West Bank.

Reaction to Israel's Aid to Nepal Following Earthquake

There are times when you realize that people are just going to be critical of you no matter what you do. It's at those times that you just have to shrug and rhetorically ask, "What can you do?"

Israel finds itself in that position often. As the only true democracy in the Middle East with neighboring countries committing human rights abuses on a daily basis, Israel is considered by the United Nations to be the worst violator of human rights -- not Iran, North Korea or Syria. At the end of last month, The U.N. Human Rights Council completed its final session in Geneva and adopted four resolutions condemning Israel, which is four times more than any of the other 192 UN member states. Amazing!

Yesterday, I had to laugh when I read a tweet by Kenneth Roth, the executive director of Human Rights Watch. Roth was commenting on the news that Israel rushed a medical team to help the victims of the horrific earthquake in Nepal. The fact that Israel was quick to send humanitarian aid and medical support to a catastrophe is nothing new. Israel is often one of the first nations to respond whenever there is a need for major disaster relief. Here is the tweet from Roth of HRW::

Easier to address a far-away humanitarian disaster than the nearby one of Israel’s making in Gaza. End the blockade! https://t.co/PUISAcGwqY
— Kenneth Roth (@KenRoth) April 26, 2015

Israel's Yom Hazikaron Contrasted to America's Memorial Day

Today is Yom Hazikaron, Israel's memorial day, and it has me looking back to December 2002 when I had the opportunity to meet some new friends at the Dead Sea, where my wife and I spent a couple of days relaxing at the end of our vacation in London and Israel. There were hundreds of men at our hotel who became severely disabled while fighting for Israel’s continued existence. They risked their lives in protecting our Jewish homeland.

They are known as N’chei Tzahal – the disabled veterans of the IDF. Some could barely walk anymore, even with the aid of a cane or a walker. Others are amputees, missing an arm or a leg, and bound to a wheelchair for the rest of their lives. Others still, were not injured while on active duty, but rather suffered life-long disabilities from a terrorist explosion while waiting at a bus stop just trying to get back to the base after a weekend off. They were at the Dead Sea to find some temporary relief from their disabling pain through the therapeutic powers of the Dead Sea.

The N’chei Tzahal come each year for two or three weeks, and most of the hotels are very accommodating to their needs, displaying a level of handicapped accessibility that is unmatched anywhere in the world. The Israeli Government pays for their much-deserved vacation, but if it is not taken by the end of the year, the opportunity is lost. Thus, many of them make their vacation to the Dead Sea at the end of every December; making the Dead Sea, in essence, the unofficial convention and reunion of Israel’s disabled veterans.

I Always Rave About Technology, But Here are Some Rants

Originally published in the Detroit Jewish News and on The Huffington Post

As part of a recent panel discussion I was asked how technology has improved our lives in general and made us more productive and efficient in particular. I gave my typical response to such a question, responding that the Internet has vastly made our lives better and provided us with a wealth of information at our fingertips that previous generations could not have imagined. I talked about the communication revolution and some of the technology innovations that I cannot believe we ever lived without like GPS, text messaging and Google Search, not to mention the ability to pause live television.

After giving this response I decided that it would only be fair to rattle off a few rants about technology in the 21st century as well. I'm always raving about the latest innovation so I figured I should also present the other side of the coin. I stopped myself after naming four negative characteristics about technology, but I realized I could keep going. So, here are my 10 rants about technology. Do you agree with these and what would you add to the list?