Funny selections from Jewsweek's Jewriffic Awards.
Best reference to child molestation:
"Rabbi Feldman, stop touching me!"
-- Adam Sandler on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno explaining what he was thinking when the director of his new movie, Spanglish, told him to channel a time from his childhood that would make him cry on cue.
Best rip-off of Fiddler on the Roof by a hot woman: Gwen Stefani riffs on Fiddler on the Roof on her new CD Love, Angel, Music, Baby with the song "Rich Girl," a take off of Tevye's "If I were a rich man".
"Now that you've let the secret out that I'm not Jewish, I expect my career to be done. Thank you very much. I appreciate that. My career is officially over."
-- Jason Biggs thanking the women of "The View" for alerting the world to the fact that he's not Jewish.
Best piece of political critique: "I don't think I've ever seen a time when the party that controlled the Senate, the House, the White House and the Supreme Court was so out of sorts about how little respect they get. At a certain point you want to say, "OK, Goliath. Stop pretending."
-- Jon Stewart writing about the recent elections in Rolling Stone Magazine.